At the end of 2020, I made a whimsical decision, to do the same walk, once a month, and take a picture of this tree. If I am honest, it was more to do with having some kind of monthly reset day, I hadn't expected it to be what it was.
Walking is one of my great places of peace, trudging out my prayers and worries gives me clarity and often builds hope.
Yesterday, I ventured out on my final walk of the year. I had hoped, that I would have had a different departure location by now, but the situation with the house remains the same. I still have not moved home.
This field has become a place of expectation. It's a good 45 mins walk from my house to the entrance and so by then I've often said what I need to say and I allow space for silence. I expect that I will enter a place of peace, for my heart and mind, and that God will speak.
As I entered the field I noticed how different it looks now the corn has gone. It looks barren, and yet I realised, it's still beautiful. Just different. "the end of something doesn't mean it wasn't purposeful", this phrase grew in my mind as I took my first few steps into the field. Often I can assume because something has ended, it wasn't worth it. This field looks destroyed, but the corn has just moved on, and the field is now resting until the next season of planting comes. It was purposeful, it still is purposeful and will still be purposeful.
I walked further into the field, with the path clear, though muddy, I was more able to see footprints, shoe prints, and hoof markings.
At first, it meant nothing, I kept walking. Again my mind was drawn to the ground. Eventually, I waited and listened.
"Others have walked this path before, you are not alone"
Only once have I met someone on this path, once in twelve months. Every other time I have been the sole walker yet, of course, others have walked the path before me and will continue to do so after me.
I feel at the moment, that I'm on the path alone, that this house situation is my journey, my walk. Yet, others have walked this path before me, I am not alone. I am so thankful for my church, how people have supported and encouraged me, and to the friends outside of the church who have done the same. I may be alone on the path itself, but others have walked it before me.
Then I got to the tree, and I was overcome with worship. Not of the tree but of Jesus and with thankfulness of how he has spoken to me, through it.
Later I came to the last part of the walk. This is where I often find myself rewording my prayers, inspired by what Jesus has spoken to me through the journey. This time, God reminded me of the Battle of Jericho. I feel like right now I am going round and round asking for the same thing and seemingly seeing nothing. I think you can see my frustration in the text today. Yet, this year there are prayers I've prayed for decades, that have been answered. So I hold on to hope, that until Jesus tells me differently, this prayer too, will finally see a breakthrough.
My full thinking is in this video:
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