It wasn't meant to take so long, instead, my story became that of a child in the back seat of a car asking "are we nearly there yet". The journey was much longer than I thought it would be.
I had a first-time buyer, and the home I now have was already empty. It should have been simple but it wasn't. It would be easy to lay blame, it's harder to believe that despite it all; it happened when it was meant to happen. There were multiple mortgage extensions, lost emails, confusion in messaging, and many, many phone calls!
Float!
They say there are two ways to survive a fall in a body of water and one thing we need to fight - our instinct, not the water. We will want to swim but the best thing is to tread water or lay back and float. Every time I tried to swim and push this move forward, I came away more frustrated. There were moments when I really didn't think it would happen, and then each time God would give me hope and remind me - "lay back and float".
I didn't want to lay back and float!
Then there was the story of Moses and the Red sea. I kept coming back to it, and I kept thinking at every obstacle - this is my red sea moment, this is where I can't do anything and God will intervene and I will be free! I guess that's how Isreal felt with every plague that hit Eygpt.
SING!
Time after time, I kept coming back to this notion that I needed to let go, to loosen my control. I had a coaching session and we came to see that the remedy for my holding on was to open my arms and sing, I had a breathwork session and realised I needed to relax and allow the air in, I had countless bible readings, prophetic words and song choices where God continually reminded me: Let go, loosen control. People kept telling me how patient I was - I promise you, that was a gift from God.
Finally, God said pack your bags and get on the move. Yet it was not to the promised land (or at least not the easiest route), it was off to Spain for a pre-booked holiday. I had tried to sort things out on my terms, I had asked for my final mortgage extension to be until the week after. They gave me until the 31st May - 4 days into my holiday.
I Need a Miracle!
I kept thinking some miracle would happen, somewhere along the line it would all fall into place before I went away, but to no avail. In fact, it seemed to get harder, it seemed like it would be impossible.
In faith (although only a mustard seed), on the 27th May, I packed everything up, paid the removal men, moved my money, left my keys with a friend, and headed off to Barcelona.
I Got A Text!
Tuesday 31st May, the last day it could happen, or it wouldn't happen at all, I woke up early, headed down to Calella Beach, and sang. At 9am I still hadn't exchanged, but around 12.30 pm I got the text, I had completed and my new home was now filled with all my belongings!
I'd like to pretend that I was full of faith from the get-go, but this simply isn't true. Faith fluctuated, yet faith was never mine in the first place, it was always given. Just at the point of no return, faith and hope would rise up in me once again (I have a load of personal vlogs that prove this).
Some would say, that God took me away on holiday because I needed to rest, and whilst that is true, in reality, it was something much more profound. He took me away, to have no control, to show me the amazing family I have here in Faversham (thank you, Karen, Tina, Steph, Sophie, Gill, Linda, and Lise especially), to teach me to let go,
and to teach me to live in awe.
(I am surrounded by diamonds)
The End!
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